Category Archives: Poem

A n d a g l e a m

You are safe for now

Or not

You think I didn’t know 

But I know

You think you are innocence

But are you?

You think I will stay silent

But I will not

You think all you did is nothing

But is it?
You think those phone calls you make were ok

But are those?

You think low of your spouse and his 

Are you?

You think those late night dinner were for work

Really?

You think those night stroll were being friendly

Seriously?

You are safe for now

Or not

You think I didn’t know 

But I know

You think you are innocence

But are you?

You think I will stay silent

But I will not

You think all you did is nothing

But is it?

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re·con·struct

Picture : we heart it

I was jealous and I felt small.
On a day I ask you to do me like you used to do others. So I could feel loved when you worshipped me. Every inch of me. With all the sweat. With all the moan and groan. 

On a day I ask you to do me like you used to do others. I hate myself for being inadequate. That I was not enough. That I am not enough. That I will never enough. Never. 
I was content but I felt cheap.

Setitik Malu

picture : helene delmaire painting

Aku pikir karena dia juga seorang wanita Dia akan mengerti pentingnya menjaga harga diri

Aku pikir karena dia juga seorang istri Dia akan mengerti pentingnya kejujuran dalam sebuah hubungan

Aku pikir karena dia juga seorang ibu Dia akan mengerti pentingnya memberi contoh tentang kebahagiaan tanpa merusak kebahagiaan orang lain

Aku pikir karena dia juga seorang manusia Dia akan memiliki setitik malu untuk mengajak lebih dulu.

Tapi ah sudahlah…

Cibubur Junction. Oct 26, 2017. Taxi 09.32 pm.

Fake

Your love is
Your word is
Your action does

What would be left?
A broken heart
A wounded soul
and A damage faith

What would be need?
?
?
?
 
What would it be?
?
?
?

Perhaps you too are.

Luna

To him

She represent the moon
A sweet, kind, smart and shy girl
That he never can escape
Long talks long nights
Shimmering in her light
To keep company
Loyal
And never will leave someone who truly loves

To her

She represent darkness
A bubbly, delude, liar and thick-faced girl
That she never can forget
Long chats long deceit
Glittering in her spite
To keep memory
Cheater
And never leave someone who wasn’t meant to be hers

Repeat

Been ages since I shed tears
Close my eyes but there’s only pain
My eyes sore
My heart heavy
My mind hurt
Tears
Tears
There’s only tears left
As I should trust when you taught me distrust
As I should believe when showed me lies
Nothing left
What’s left
As words never ment to comprehend
Dont talk about love
It’s not even love
Love doesn’t hurt
Being left to sleep does
Wound the night hollow the day
O dear sun, he doesn’t deserve
Your shine.

It Hurts.


Love is hurt
Love is capable to destroy one heart and cherish the other

Love is capable to make people blind of one eye and one heart

I could love

I could hate

I could transform love into hate

Love is jealousy

Love is when one entitled was allow to wait in the dark and the forbidden one was allow to bath in shine

I could love

I could revenge

I could transpire love into revenge

Love is stupid

Love is when you dive into lust of your own and don give a fuck to other.

Love is when you bow in temporary cheap thrills and lost in adultery.

I could love

I could, Love x

Memories

It’s been sixteen years
Loong and hollow

There’s day it was unbearable

But then there’s day I hardly remember

Mind is like a mesh

Remember certain things 

And forgot others

I was afraid I’d forget

So I have you everywhere

In pictures

in wall

in wallet

in your old book recipe 

In your handwriting

That’s how I keep you alive

By remembering

By baking

By cooking

Because only then I can meet you through memories.

Drilling Holes

large

Picture: we heart it

We’ve been running through the same circle.
Circle full of pain. Full of numbness. Full of vain.

I want to curse. I want to scream. I want to shout.
All your bullshit words.
Of live. Of love. Of money. Of everything

We’ve been crying through the unshed tears.
Tears full of misery. Full of disappointment. Full of hurt.

I want to curse. I want to scream. I want to shout.
All your shitty role.
About live. About love. About money. About everything.

We’ve been tortured through all the lies.
Lies full of hatred. Full of disgrace. Full of wrath.

I want to curse. I want to scream. I want to shout.
All your fucking perspective.
About live. About love. About money. About everything.

Unfair

image

One being said
Was different from
One being felt

I was cry for you
I was cry for him
For you to feel the unfairness
That was totally denied
Totally unacceptable
For him to have feel the unfairness
That should name of love
Totally bullshit love

One being said
Was different from
One being felt

I was cry for you
I was cry for him
For you my ache gone deeper
That I didn’t remember mine
Only yours
For him to have drag down
That I have so much bitterness for
Only you

One being said
Was different from
One being felt

I was cry for you
I was cry for him
For you to have gone through all
The bullshit that I have to witness
That crashing down your life
For him to have one undefined
Role that let you be swept by waves
That limiting your life

One being said
Was different from
One being felt.